Всегда говори 'Да'

Carl, I know it's you.

Oh. Hey, man. I was just about to call you. That's so weird. Had your number dialed, was about to press 'send'. Did you block your number?

Yeah, I did. You never answer when I don't.

You did get my text, right?

What? Text? What?

We're all going out tonight.

Man, that sounds great. I wish I could join you. I'm just so jammed up. I'm totally off the grid, you know?

No, I don't at all.

I got a bunch of stuff going on. There's this thing I gotta do. Any other night would've been great.

I don't think there's anything written down in your fake calendar.

No, it says specific things.

Specific things. Like 'get in line at the video store'?

What? What are you talking about? I'm not at the video store. I'm in my apartment.

I can see you, Carl. I'm outside the video store.

That's not me.

Look who's here.

Hey. You.

I don't believe it.

Rooney.

Carl Allen. Never thought I'd see the day, my man.

I'm so glad I came out. Love it. Okay, you know what? I gotta go.

No. No. Carl, you're gonna stay.

What?

It's been years. You leave every time she comes.

Totally unrelated. It has nothing to do with Stephanie.

Carl. Peter. Rooney.

Stephanie, guys.

You're leaving?

Yeah, unfortunately. Terrible timing too, because you just got here.

You just got here, too, Carl.

Yeah, but he's got a thing.

Yeah, that's a thing. There's a thing, and there's no time. There's a time crunch, and time is of the essence.

Oh! Hi, Tillie.

Morning, Carl. Would you like to come over for a little breakfast?

Gee, that sounds great, but I can't.

Some cereal, a little yogurt?

Yeah, no.

How about some toast, huh?

You know, I have to go to work, but thanks.

You're with Norman. Uh-huh. Are you sure? Because… Okay. Yep. Whatever you say.

Remember that promotion we were talking about?

Yeah.

It's not gonna happen. Tried to fight for you on the phone there. It was between you and Demko, and they went with Demko.

I don't care. I didn't really want the job badly.

Look at it this way: at least you didn't get shit-canned. Do you know what that means?

Fired?

How did you know what that meant? Have you heard me say that before?

No, it's a pretty common expression.

In my circles. I made it up.

Well, it's catching on.

This'll cheer you up. I'm having a little get-together at my place. It's a funny hat and-or wig party.

Sucks I'm gonna be out of town.

You don't know what day it is.

When is it?

Friday.

I'm out of town.

You spoke at the same time I did just then. Like you were committed to saying what you were saying regardless of what I was gonna say.

Wanna know my secret? I'm a yes man. The word 'yes' has changed my life. Here.

No, thanks. I'm fine.

'Fine?' I wipe my ass with 'fine'.

Wow. Okay.

Why don't you take this rock, throw it at that bank and shatter the window?

No, thanks.

Then ask me if I want to.

Do you wanna throw that rock at the bank?

Yes.

Oh, my God. What are you, nuts?

Stephanie?

Carl.

Yeah, it's me. Just felt like calling you. I was missing you, I guess. Weird, huh?

Yes, Carl. I have to go. Ted and I are taking a little boat ride.

Oh, that's great. Good for you. Good for you.

You missed my engagement party tonight.

Oh, no. Oh, shoot, you're kidding. That was tonight?

Mm-hm.

I'm so sorry, man. I totally gapped it. Listen, I'll make it up to you. I promise. I swear. You pick the day. Any day you want, we'll go out, swashbuckle.

And guess what? She doesn't like my best friend. I keep trying to think of reasons why she should, but you know what? I can't think of any. I don't wanna hear another excuse, Carl. You do whatever you want. I'm telling you, you don't change your life, you're gonna end up lonely. A lonely guy, Carl. Lonely guy.

Hey, Rooney, come here for a second. Carl look a little odd to you? Is it me, or does it look like he's kind of dead?

Nope. No more than usual.

I don't know. I'm kind of leaning towards thinking he might actually be dead.

I guess I never saw him a lot, so it's hard for me to tell the difference.